These days not much shocks me, but when this obscure product arrived in my inbox yesterday ...
I thought this was some extra special foolery. If you're like a few others who I sent a picture of the above "device" to, you thought it was either:
a) A futuristic maxi pad (Erica),
b) a water balloon launcher, but a nice one. One only Richie Rich would own because it's gold. (Carol),
c) a jock strap (Allie),
d) a chastity belt (Raven's Rob) or
3) some new-age sex apparatus (me).
Welp, we were all wrong. What you're looking at is a "a chest pillow to help women eliminate and prevent chest wrinkles while they sleep". The e-mail subject of said PR pitch was and I quote:
"Eliminate Chest Wrinkles Just in Time for Those Low Cut, Valentine'
I'm sorry, but what the eff are chest wrinkles? And why do I need to eliminate them?
 |
| "I like how they add a bow to it to class it up" - Beth |
I mean, what is your husband or boyfriend going to do when you crawl into bed and strap that thing on? He's going to look at you like you've lost your damn mind is what he's going to do.
In all honesty, I do think this thing could provide some relief to women who are breast feeding or just had "enhancements", but I have never, ever once even thought about "chest wrinkles". Furthermore, if you do have serious chest wrinkles, you are probably at an age where you don't need to have your coconuts out and about for all to see.
I am sure this is not the post Intimia had in mind when they contacted me, but any publicity is good publicity, right?
Can someone explain to me why I just ordered one of these?
joshin.
Holy mother of monkeys. And, to top it off, she's sleepin in that racy lil red n black thing with that thing that looks like some sort of post surgery brace. What WILL they think of next? Wowza.
ReplyDeleteWow.....just....wow. I definitely thought it was a jock strap at first haha
ReplyDeleteim surprised you even opened the email (i always press delete haha) but I AM FREAKING GLAD YOU DID! i had a bad day in these parts, but seeing this cheered me up. i still cant find the use for it. i dont care what they say is the use...it truly cant have one use (or perhaps it has many!).
ReplyDeleteOMG! I DIE! who has chest wrinkles?
ReplyDeletei was hoping it was a place to store booze in your bra.
ReplyDeleteway to let me down.
cheeriosandbeer
Um, you turned down organic bedding??????? Like sheets? Those are the frikkin' bomb.
ReplyDeleteSo I'm not going to lie, I totally have chest wrinkles and have for about 5 years now. They're scary... but this apparatus is much scarier. Yikes! I never knew chest wrinkles were that common either, haha!! I've honestly never talked about them or told anyone - consider yourself the 1st in knowing about this overly awkward issue of mine!
ReplyDeletethe only way i would buy this was if there were a straw attached and wine inside. think about it.. getting drunk in your sleep... sounds safe to me!! and then the babydaddy might finally get that morning "love" he begs for all the time... or not.
ReplyDeletebut seriously, i thought it was every girls goal to have her boobs CLOSE together and not be trained to be farther apart???
I don't feel like my boobs are that far apart... This looks painful to me.
ReplyDeleteomg what the effffff hahaha
ReplyDeleteHaha... that's hilarious!
ReplyDeleteOMG. That is freakin' hilarious. Really, what will they come up with next? Actually, I think I have seen chest wrinkles, but like you said if your skin looks old enough to have those you need to just cover it on up.
ReplyDeleteWhat I'm really missing here is the before and after shot. Is that pervy?
ReplyDeleteI don't understand what chest wrinkles are still. haha
ReplyDeleteahhhh i am literally laughing out loud at my desk!
ReplyDeletethis is effing priceless. :)
i may buy one for my sister.
I've never in my life heard of chest wrinkles. Sounds gross.
ReplyDeleteI will admit that I think the bow with a diamond stud adds a little class to it. Just sayin'
I feel like there's no way that would fit comfortably between my boobs. It just looks terribly uncomfortable. And ridiculous.
ReplyDeleteSeriously... everyone at work right now is wondering why in the heck I am laughing so hysterically! AWESOME FRIGGIN POST!
ReplyDeleteOMG lol. Who the eff could fall asleep with that contraption on them? Like seriously ?
ReplyDeleteOh my, I just died from laughter!
ReplyDeletewhat the effff bahaha! So ridiculous, but I guess it could have it's uses, like you said.
ReplyDeleteP.S. I'm still trying to figure out what a chest wrinkle is??
Wow. How uncomfortable. And unneccessary?
ReplyDeleteThis post just make my day "you are probably at an age where you don't need to have your COCONUTS out and about for all to see."
ReplyDeleteHA! Priceless...
This made me LMAO. Hilarious!
ReplyDeleteWOW. A man must have thought of that!
ReplyDeleteI die. That is the most ridiculous thing I've ever seen. I agree, a man must have thought of that! And it doesn't look even remotely comfortable!
ReplyDeleteHahaha that is one of the wierdest thing I'ver seen! How uncomfortable!
ReplyDeleteI thought it might've been a camelbak for wine. Silly me!
ReplyDeleteThe guy next to me in my meeting has to think I'm crazy as I am laughing hysterically right now. Chest wrinkles?? Seriously? I thought it was a fancy jock strap.
ReplyDeleteseriously, that is hilarious! chest wrinkles?! never ever heard of that! too funny!
ReplyDeleteand i think hubby would just look at me, shake his head and continue to have a conversation with me. nothing phases him now. hhaa.
Holy hell..what on earth?? You didn't really order that DID YOU??
ReplyDeleteAnd I can only pray to GOD that one day I have something big enough on my chest to make wrinkles. Shiest. This is dumb.
TAG! You're it. You've been tagged in a funny little post. Click on over to http://southernambition04025.blogspot.com/2012/01/tag-youre-it.html to find out more!
ReplyDeletexo, Michelle
TAG! You're it. You've been tagged in a funny little post. Click on over to http://southernambition04025.blogspot.com/2012/01/tag-youre-it.html to find out more!
ReplyDeletexo, Michelle
BAHAHAHAHA! This is hilarious.
ReplyDeleteOMG! I can't believe someone though that was a good idea.
ReplyDeletehahaha Straddling a hog. I just died lol
ReplyDeleteyeah this thing was UNREAL!! I almost want to get it just to try it out. I mean maybe if i had huge double D's i might need it for the wrinkle side effects, but not a current problem on my end! aka I have teeny bubbies!
hahaha please take a pic of you wearing it!
xoxox
OMG you did NOT order one!?!?! HAHAHAHA! I'm dying over here and wondering if this was some sort of joke . . . what the heck is a CHEST wrinkle?! I'm so grateful that you posted this because it gave me a much needed laugh. HAHA! PLEASE post pics as soon as yours arrives in the mail.
ReplyDeleteThe "cosmetic nurse" that invented this useful contraption seems really legit.
ReplyDeleteAnd I thought everyone already knew that pillows are key to preventing wrinkles! It's what I've been using for years :)
wow, just wow!
ReplyDeleteThis is hilarious. I definitely that what your thought was..something sexual. How weird!
ReplyDeleteOMG. I laughed so hard. At the office. WTF?! And how do people come up with this crap?!
ReplyDeletehahahaha Oh goodness!
ReplyDeleteThat thing is insane!! I agree with Beth on how nice the bow is! It definetly classes it up! LOL! If I came to bed with that shz on my hubby would probably kick me the hell outta bed!
ReplyDeleteThis is amazing. Seriously. Wow.
ReplyDeleteI am literally peeing my pants over here, j/k! Seriously, that is the funniest shit I have seen in a long time!! WOw. I needed to see that/your reaction to it. Priceless. bahaha
ReplyDeleteWow that was not what I was expecting it to be lol.
ReplyDeleteThat's hilarious, as was your post. I thought it was some kind of back brace, so my guess wasn't that far off!
ReplyDeleteSurprisingly, I'm pretty interested in this lol. I have fairly large boobs (32D) and am a side sleeper. I don't wake up w/ chest wrinkles, but in the future this maybe something I would look into.
ReplyDeleteXo
aahahahah. this is ridiculous! ps "can somone please explain to me wy I just ordered one of these?" I totally believed you and gasped outloud. bahah
ReplyDeletethanks for making me laugh tonight!
i swear by this chest pillow, i used it every night! NOT! hahaha this is soo funny. People will buy anything! LOL thanks for a good laugh :)
ReplyDeleteBahahahaha! I would die if that came in my inbox, hilarious!
ReplyDeleteSeriously WTF is that?! Only you would get these crazy emails! LOL
ReplyDeleteI'm with Erica though on what she thinks it looks like! HAHA
hahaha i was totally with you on the sex apparatus! i'm glad for the video just so i know how it actually fits! who came up with this?! worse, who paid to actually have these produced!!
ReplyDeleteAnd don't worry - i got a pitch for plus clothing too! haha
HI-larious!
What the........?
ReplyDeleteHAHA!! I love the responses that you got from the ladies above. There is no way that I would ever suspect that contraption was for boobie wrinkles!!!
Too funny!!!
Oh my! Visiting via A Suitcase and Stilettos, and what a fine post. My bf guessed the first image was a bikini?! And the ad photo was a cleavage cover up, and wondered who would buy it. I reckon (New Zealand representing!) you should provide all this feedback to them with your hell to the no email.
ReplyDeleteDoes this count as your post for them?!
ReplyDeleteI thought you needed to know that this was on the Ellen Show today!!!
ReplyDeleteIt looked just as ridiculous, but it was great for a good laugh :)
What the heck?! I actually saw this on Ellen the other day! (Of course she was making fun of it). How ridiculous - there's no way I could sleep with that thing strapped to me.
ReplyDelete